Want longer, deeper, more intensely pleasurable orgasms? Sure, who doesn’t, right? Follow these simple tips and you’ll come like a pro!
1. Take a long, hot shower or bath before masturbation or sex. The heat soothes and relaxes muscles, allowing you to be more relaxed in your pleasure. Betty Dodson, pioneer sexologist and author of the seminal (ah-hem) work on masturbation, talks about the different kinds of orgasms. Most of us learned to tense our muscles to create sexual excitement, perhaps from fear of being caught. Tense muscles, however, can restrict pleasure and movement.
2. Stretch the hips, pelvic floor, and PC muscles. Slow hip circles, yoga-style Cat/Cow postures, Bridge position, low deep squats. Anything that awakens the muscles and brings oxygenated blood to the genital area will increase sensation.
3. Deepen the breath, and use a “charging” breath to bring energy to the sex center. Charging breath is a deep inhale that fills the abdomen, chest and throat areas, followed by a long, easy release of breath. Try 10-15 of these to get the sexual energy flowing.
4. Instead of reaching right away for the vibrator, use fingers to tease the creases of the legs, inner thighs, and genital area.
5. Squeeze the PC muscles (kegels) 10-20 repetitions.
6. Slow down the process. Touch all areas of the body. Bring energy and attention to the hands and feet, throat, calves, belly, ears. Spend time exploring the entire body instead of going right for the jewels. Good orgasms take time.
7. Put on some sexy music, and build erotic energy by dancing, while maintaining connection with your breath and sex.
8. Build and Build and Build the tension. Touch a little bit. Breathe a little bit. Read some erotica, look at some porn, touch some more. Get a drink of water, look out the window, and continue. Build and when it starts feeling really good, stop and spread the feelings around the body with your hands. Bring sexy energy towards the heart.
9. When orgasm starts to feel close, again squeezing and releasing the PC muscles, and timing it with the breath continues to build the erotic charge in the genitals. Bring it closer, stop, tease again, stop. See how close you can get. Hold your breath as you tease yourself, and feel the energy really build. Stay on the edge as long as you can.
10. Relax all of the muscles as you bring yourself over the edge. Instead of pushing out or pulling in, see if you can just let orgasm happen. And when it does, allow yourself to stay in that glowing, golden space for at least TEN minutes afterwards. Let all the juicy health benefits of that oxytocin release penetrate the bloodstream and make you HAPPY!
If you try these things, and you are still challenged, give me a call. www.emancipating-sexuality.com
I welcome your comments, thoughts and questions below!